...And that's all there is to it.
Need to vent out. To angst. To watch the world crumble to pieces in front of me- for the umpteenth time. Is there no such thing as an escape route? Once reality catches up with you, it leaves a burning mark.
Too bad, though. Reality's cruelty never leaves you untainted. Unspoiled. Untarnished.
Today. This cursed day, like any other typical bad-luck-enhanced day. I'm not expecting the worst. Oh no, sire. I'm not.
What's the friggin' use of trying to cheer yourself up, anyway? To lighten up your own mood, all by yourself, simply because you don't want your facade and pride to come crumbling down also? It wounds your ego. Of course that's always a fact. Always.
I know. I'm talking some rubbish, nonsensical words, phrases, sentences- time and time again. I can't help it, however. I'm also aware that despite angsting unreasonably here, I'll never be able to type in the main cause anyway. Just let this out. That's all I can ask- from myself.
Dammit, so insecure. So unsure. So lacking of self-esteem. Is this the farthest point I can go, even if heaven knows I can still push myself over the limit? My settled limit?
School. Necessities. Grades. Pride. Social relationships. Love? Life. Many weights, crashing down on me all at once, my shoulders, body, mind- unable to bear them. But what, then? I- may not have the right to complain. I may not have every right in the world to whine about duties, responsibilities, etc.etc- since I am to accept them eventually. When there's no more path that stretches itself in front of you, on the very place you've put your feet on- it leaves you no other option. Just follow, you have to.
Existence being cut off. *sighs*
...But hell no, not yet- at least, not now. There are still a whole lot of things to ponder. To muse about. To give time for.
Monday, October 13, 2008
Sunday, October 12, 2008
Fanfic: Masquerade [Ryoma/Sakuno]
Title: Masquerade
Rated: PG13
Fandom: Prince of Tennis
Summary: Rigid. Oblivious. They were strangers and lovers at the same time. Ten evidences of their familiarity with each other.
Warning: Angst. Possible OOC (It’s been a VERY long while since I last wrote a PoT piece. My sincerest apologies if it turns out to be OOC-packed… or something.) Copy-pasta, this is. =D
Note: Written for _ryosaku community at LJ. Since I can now archive it anywhere I want anyway, I'll do some shameless plugging! *gets geassed to commit suicide*
She jolted up awake and dazed, fingering her collar only to discover that two of her uppermost buttons were open.
Rated: PG13
Fandom: Prince of Tennis
Summary: Rigid. Oblivious. They were strangers and lovers at the same time. Ten evidences of their familiarity with each other.
Warning: Angst. Possible OOC (It’s been a VERY long while since I last wrote a PoT piece. My sincerest apologies if it turns out to be OOC-packed… or something.) Copy-pasta, this is. =D
Note: Written for _ryosaku community at LJ. Since I can now archive it anywhere I want anyway, I'll do some shameless plugging! *gets geassed to commit suicide*
She jolted up awake and dazed, fingering her collar only to discover that two of her uppermost buttons were open.
Saturday, October 11, 2008
Editorial: Physics?
See this coming. *nods*
Just Because
Physics is, by definition, the science of matter, energy and their interactions. It’s nothing more than a subject- yes; just one of the many subjects. And yet, we find ourselves in the verge of pulling our hair strands out in frustration over it. There’s always a reason behind everything, though. Hence, there’s a reason behind why we’re taking this subject still even if we think this is a nightmare coming true- a good reason at that.
As if the other tough subjects weren’t enough, the juniors are now burdened more by Physics. Most of the students tend to either get traumatized by or loathe the said subject simply because it’s hard- with all the analysis and calculations combined. However, if we don’t have Physics, would the junior life be easier? If so, isn’t the main reason why we ought to undergo hard subjects is because it would shape us Scientians to better people?
We always complain about how Physics can affect our future lives anyway. Some would take Nursing, others law, and some- well, not completely Physics-related. So why take the said subject when it’s not even worth it? Physics is, no matter which angle you look at it, science- and more importantly as Sceintians, we need to learn how things work and how they interact with forces in nature. We study it because it’s a major part of our education.
Given the importance of Physics, although in some painful harsh ways we see it; it can serve us our motivation- since it mirrors our mistakes. Being a Scientian was never an easy feat, and Physics is just one of the many obstacles we ought to face. Bearing that in mind, despite feeling disagreeable with it, we’ll always encounter Physics. Remember: Life’s full of ups and downs. One can’t expect a smooth easy life.
We view Physics as a sort-of enemy for us Scientians, and every hour of it is like an hour in a battlefield. How we see it still depends on how we believe in it- and how we treat it. Nobody can force anybody to like Physics- but, if we’ll all just take this subject seriously, at least we’ll learn to appreciate it and treat it not as a waste of our time.
Just Because
Physics is, by definition, the science of matter, energy and their interactions. It’s nothing more than a subject- yes; just one of the many subjects. And yet, we find ourselves in the verge of pulling our hair strands out in frustration over it. There’s always a reason behind everything, though. Hence, there’s a reason behind why we’re taking this subject still even if we think this is a nightmare coming true- a good reason at that.
As if the other tough subjects weren’t enough, the juniors are now burdened more by Physics. Most of the students tend to either get traumatized by or loathe the said subject simply because it’s hard- with all the analysis and calculations combined. However, if we don’t have Physics, would the junior life be easier? If so, isn’t the main reason why we ought to undergo hard subjects is because it would shape us Scientians to better people?
We always complain about how Physics can affect our future lives anyway. Some would take Nursing, others law, and some- well, not completely Physics-related. So why take the said subject when it’s not even worth it? Physics is, no matter which angle you look at it, science- and more importantly as Sceintians, we need to learn how things work and how they interact with forces in nature. We study it because it’s a major part of our education.
Given the importance of Physics, although in some painful harsh ways we see it; it can serve us our motivation- since it mirrors our mistakes. Being a Scientian was never an easy feat, and Physics is just one of the many obstacles we ought to face. Bearing that in mind, despite feeling disagreeable with it, we’ll always encounter Physics. Remember: Life’s full of ups and downs. One can’t expect a smooth easy life.
We view Physics as a sort-of enemy for us Scientians, and every hour of it is like an hour in a battlefield. How we see it still depends on how we believe in it- and how we treat it. Nobody can force anybody to like Physics- but, if we’ll all just take this subject seriously, at least we’ll learn to appreciate it and treat it not as a waste of our time.
(Ending) Review: Code Geass
Before I let myself drown in the swamp of misery and bitterness known as Code Geass again, does this make sense to anybody? This: "To die is to live" line, and vice versa? Like, you'd wish you've never been born, and eventually will be the one to live on... and then the one who wished to stay alive with mortals end up being the one slain?
Cringed.
SPOILERS. Scroll down if you dare. =]
They never failed to stun us, that Sunrise. Code Geass R2's last turn pretty much gave a pang on my chest, a pinch on the heart, made my face bitter and hollow and- you get the point. Apparently, it was just- well, borderline satisfying? But very painful indeed. But beautiful at the same time. Damn it, I need to straigthen my thoughts up. *sighs*
For Lelouch to die, for him to be loathed even at his death. It pains me. He didn't deserve that. No, sire.
Not at all.
Sacrifices. Self-sacrifice, he did. And this was all he can get? A pink gay sword running through his chest, tainted with blood, gripped by his best friend? Although, somehow, a little part of me wanted to think that it's probably for the best.
His face, once consciousness left him forever, was still- well, peaceful. You sick, masochistic Lelouch. *shakes head*
And C.C... Crap, I swear I was moved when she shed a tear. Mellowed. Soft. This C.C. that 's hardly her usual personality. Like, even-if-she-prays-to-God-he-won't-listen-to-them-because-which-divinity-would-listen-to-a-witch-anyway? Paiiin. *angsts* B-But, she cried. For the very first time. ;____;
And that was it. Everything else screamed- happy to me. Ougi/Villeta pairing, probably the only obvious canon in the series. And lol, the crack parts. Jeremiah working in an orange plantation. With Anya, no less. And Suzaku- I don't know if my hatred faded or has just either grown or lessen. You'll be in pain, being the Zero. Living on, when you wished to die in the first place.
Still, doesn't change what I felt. Despair. It's dim-witted of me to go b'awwwing over fandom stuffs, and yet- it struck me. Hard. I'll forever ship Lelouc/C.C. though, hopefully, and we're not sure yet if Lelouch really had died, or ventured into the World of C, or- on an optimistic view, the mysterious carraige man C.C. had traveled with at the end. Dammit Sunrise, even at the series' finale, you're still a cliffhanger? It's killing me. T___T
And no, I hope I won't go "BRB, CRYING" anymore, but Code Geass is- really epic, it's hard to kick it out of my head now. Close to impossible.
Enough with fandom rants. It pains me again.
Cringed.
SPOILERS. Scroll down if you dare. =]
They never failed to stun us, that Sunrise. Code Geass R2's last turn pretty much gave a pang on my chest, a pinch on the heart, made my face bitter and hollow and- you get the point. Apparently, it was just- well, borderline satisfying? But very painful indeed. But beautiful at the same time. Damn it, I need to straigthen my thoughts up. *sighs*
For Lelouch to die, for him to be loathed even at his death. It pains me. He didn't deserve that. No, sire.
Not at all.
Sacrifices. Self-sacrifice, he did. And this was all he can get? A pink gay sword running through his chest, tainted with blood, gripped by his best friend? Although, somehow, a little part of me wanted to think that it's probably for the best.
His face, once consciousness left him forever, was still- well, peaceful. You sick, masochistic Lelouch. *shakes head*
And C.C... Crap, I swear I was moved when she shed a tear. Mellowed. Soft. This C.C. that 's hardly her usual personality. Like, even-if-she-prays-to-God-he-won't-listen-to-them-because-which-divinity-would-listen-to-a-witch-anyway? Paiiin. *angsts* B-But, she cried. For the very first time. ;____;
And that was it. Everything else screamed- happy to me. Ougi/Villeta pairing, probably the only obvious canon in the series. And lol, the crack parts. Jeremiah working in an orange plantation. With Anya, no less. And Suzaku- I don't know if my hatred faded or has just either grown or lessen. You'll be in pain, being the Zero. Living on, when you wished to die in the first place.
Still, doesn't change what I felt. Despair. It's dim-witted of me to go b'awwwing over fandom stuffs, and yet- it struck me. Hard. I'll forever ship Lelouc/C.C. though, hopefully, and we're not sure yet if Lelouch really had died, or ventured into the World of C, or- on an optimistic view, the mysterious carraige man C.C. had traveled with at the end. Dammit Sunrise, even at the series' finale, you're still a cliffhanger? It's killing me. T___T
And no, I hope I won't go "BRB, CRYING" anymore, but Code Geass is- really epic, it's hard to kick it out of my head now. Close to impossible.
Enough with fandom rants. It pains me again.
Features:
Putting this piece up, yet again. Expect more rounds coming. =D
[Quote:]
Hit and Smash
Ever got tired of exercises, the same plain old run-and-jog thingy you do during the wee hours of the morning just to burn calories and keep your body in a healthy fit? Grab a racket then, and start heading towards the nearest badminton courts.
Badminton is a game long played before up until now, and even if in some point in the history, its popularity seemed to fade, it never really grows old. It was even believed to date back during the Ancient Greek era in an early form. It became an Olympic sport since 1992.
It’s a racket sport played by either two opposing players (termed as: singles) or two opposing pairs (termed as: doubles). The players score points by hitting a shuttlecock with their racket to make it pass beyond the net to the opposite side of the courts, and trying to make the opponent miss the incoming shuttlecock.
The rules are quite simple to follow. Of course, like any other sports, there are limitations to take note of and, fouls and faults to avoid. The most common fault that one can commit is the failure to return the struck shuttlecock back to the opponent. Other faults include the failure of a player to do right in his service or turn to hit the shuttlecock, or if the shuttlecock went outside the courts or up the ceiling.
The equipments involved are: the badminton racket, which is noticeably lighter than the tennis one, the shuttlecock, the ‘ball’ of the play, the strings and grip, the shoes (which can be tennis shoes) and the badminton court and net.
Badminton is comparable to tennis in most ways. The main distinguishable difference between the two might be the tools used in the play. Badminton uses the shuttlecock, while tennis uses the tennis ball. Other differences include- in tennis, the ball is allowed to bounce once before it gets hit, while in badminton, the rally is over if the shuttlecock hits the ground.
Badminton is said to be one of the finest conditioning game activities, according to the Department of Physical Education at Baylor University. Said sports require lots of running, jumping, hand-eye coordination, and good reflexes- thus making it a worth of your time.
Indeed, badminton is just one of the hundreds of sports existing today. However, it’s unique in its own way- whether we do it just to kill time, or for recreation, or for a more serious note. Badminton will surely be worth your while.
Ever got tired of exercises, the same plain old run-and-jog thingy you do during the wee hours of the morning just to burn calories and keep your body in a healthy fit? Grab a racket then, and start heading towards the nearest badminton courts.
Badminton is a game long played before up until now, and even if in some point in the history, its popularity seemed to fade, it never really grows old. It was even believed to date back during the Ancient Greek era in an early form. It became an Olympic sport since 1992.
It’s a racket sport played by either two opposing players (termed as: singles) or two opposing pairs (termed as: doubles). The players score points by hitting a shuttlecock with their racket to make it pass beyond the net to the opposite side of the courts, and trying to make the opponent miss the incoming shuttlecock.
The rules are quite simple to follow. Of course, like any other sports, there are limitations to take note of and, fouls and faults to avoid. The most common fault that one can commit is the failure to return the struck shuttlecock back to the opponent. Other faults include the failure of a player to do right in his service or turn to hit the shuttlecock, or if the shuttlecock went outside the courts or up the ceiling.
The equipments involved are: the badminton racket, which is noticeably lighter than the tennis one, the shuttlecock, the ‘ball’ of the play, the strings and grip, the shoes (which can be tennis shoes) and the badminton court and net.
Badminton is comparable to tennis in most ways. The main distinguishable difference between the two might be the tools used in the play. Badminton uses the shuttlecock, while tennis uses the tennis ball. Other differences include- in tennis, the ball is allowed to bounce once before it gets hit, while in badminton, the rally is over if the shuttlecock hits the ground.
Badminton is said to be one of the finest conditioning game activities, according to the Department of Physical Education at Baylor University. Said sports require lots of running, jumping, hand-eye coordination, and good reflexes- thus making it a worth of your time.
Indeed, badminton is just one of the hundreds of sports existing today. However, it’s unique in its own way- whether we do it just to kill time, or for recreation, or for a more serious note. Badminton will surely be worth your while.
[/Quote]
Editorial: Sports
Done for Journ II. Putting this up.
[Quote] Through the Liquid Sheets
The general definition of swimming is- a term for a water sport, or probably a means of exercise by wadding and playing in the waters. However we tend to portray it, or which angle we look at it, swimming is a sport- a mere, tiring one for some, but for others, a slightly different activity in which they benefit not only satisfaction, but enjoyment as well.
Today, to take and choose swimming, of all sports out there, as your hobby would probably be the last thing you’ll have in mind. There are simply many reasons why we think that swimming is quite burdensome, compared to other seemingly easier, more worthwhile games. Unlike most sports, it takes a whole bunch of training sessions, mainly the journeys through the water under the scorching hot sun- spending lots of times in territories we’re not really accustomed to.
Sure, we get to learn how to swim, and it feels good knowing that, we’ve learned how to get in tune with the waters and not just in land- for a price. In training sessions, we usually get terrible sunburns, if not turning our skins from its original color to tan or even crispy brown. Self-conscious people, specifically the teenagers, do not really approve of swimming because of these reasons.
Still, like any other sports out there, swimming requires an awful lot of determination and- mindset. It also has many advantages, too, which we probably don’t muse about much nowadays. But we all know that sports are never unhealthy. Swimming- what for? Only for the welfare of your heart and lungs?
Regular swimming sessions or practices help build your endurance, muscle strength, and cardio-vascular fitness- your exercise in one mean package. It can also serve as a great social outlet, since you get to spend time not only in the waters, but with your friends or even acquaintances as well.
There are also some disadvantages- and the major one is that- swimming makes one loss tad a bit more weight than needed. It can also be tiring, too. Despite all of that, if properly done, and enjoyed, swimming can be one’s lifetime sport. [/Quote]
(Yeah, I know right? Journ... suckiness. My suckiness, that us. XD)
[Quote] Through the Liquid Sheets
The general definition of swimming is- a term for a water sport, or probably a means of exercise by wadding and playing in the waters. However we tend to portray it, or which angle we look at it, swimming is a sport- a mere, tiring one for some, but for others, a slightly different activity in which they benefit not only satisfaction, but enjoyment as well.
Today, to take and choose swimming, of all sports out there, as your hobby would probably be the last thing you’ll have in mind. There are simply many reasons why we think that swimming is quite burdensome, compared to other seemingly easier, more worthwhile games. Unlike most sports, it takes a whole bunch of training sessions, mainly the journeys through the water under the scorching hot sun- spending lots of times in territories we’re not really accustomed to.
Sure, we get to learn how to swim, and it feels good knowing that, we’ve learned how to get in tune with the waters and not just in land- for a price. In training sessions, we usually get terrible sunburns, if not turning our skins from its original color to tan or even crispy brown. Self-conscious people, specifically the teenagers, do not really approve of swimming because of these reasons.
Still, like any other sports out there, swimming requires an awful lot of determination and- mindset. It also has many advantages, too, which we probably don’t muse about much nowadays. But we all know that sports are never unhealthy. Swimming- what for? Only for the welfare of your heart and lungs?
Regular swimming sessions or practices help build your endurance, muscle strength, and cardio-vascular fitness- your exercise in one mean package. It can also serve as a great social outlet, since you get to spend time not only in the waters, but with your friends or even acquaintances as well.
There are also some disadvantages- and the major one is that- swimming makes one loss tad a bit more weight than needed. It can also be tiring, too. Despite all of that, if properly done, and enjoyed, swimming can be one’s lifetime sport. [/Quote]
(Yeah, I know right? Journ... suckiness. My suckiness, that us. XD)
Gain Anything From Insults? Not.
[Beware of mild cursing here. You've been warned]
Before I begin, let me tell you, dear reader, that this might, somehow, offend somebody. So, before your conscience (I kid you, yes) gets the better of you, I have one thing to say: 'I'm truthfully and deeply sorry for this'.
School bullies. ARGH... We hate them. Their loathsome and I despise them.
It's just that... I'm plain tired of hearing insults time and again AND time and again. I mean, come on! Get real. What will you get after numerous insults, hmm? Will that benefit you? Look, I just want to get this load off my chest. I really want to complain about these issues. We all know that.
Nothing will happen if we just let those insults pass through like we're ghostly beings.
We have every right to complain. Why? Because we are free, after all.
We can't just laugh along with every insults they throw on us, as if it was only a joke. We can't just smile along with every lame statement they throw on us. And we just can't ride along with their funny lines, to think that we are their victims.
I don't care if bullies did these on purpose or accidentally. In any way it's not funny, totally. We have feelings, emotions, and hearts. Hellooooo... Like, excuse me, aren't we free take revenge on them? (Now I'm really, really angry.)
That's it. They had already crossed the line. They had already pulled the last straw.
I'm speaking here like a person knowing its freedom and free will. I'm speaking here like a bird longing for its freedom. I'm speaking here like I know that it is right for someone like me, a feeble little being who is a natural rebel.
I'm not saying these for personal gain or something, but I'm thoroughly mad at this very moment. You know why, and that's all I need to say before somebody calls me a stupid blabbermouth.
Right. And about these issues I'm talking about. Let's just say that they have something to do with lines, talks and most importantly, DAMNED insults, of course.
Once again, I'm sorry for those I offended.
[Ow. The wonders of copy-pasta. Ripped from my first blog. *shrugs* Oh- when was this written? A very long time, perhaps. And oh- look deeper. =] I've hid something here. *shot*]
Before I begin, let me tell you, dear reader, that this might, somehow, offend somebody. So, before your conscience (I kid you, yes) gets the better of you, I have one thing to say: 'I'm truthfully and deeply sorry for this'.
School bullies. ARGH... We hate them. Their loathsome and I despise them.
It's just that... I'm plain tired of hearing insults time and again AND time and again. I mean, come on! Get real. What will you get after numerous insults, hmm? Will that benefit you? Look, I just want to get this load off my chest. I really want to complain about these issues. We all know that.
Nothing will happen if we just let those insults pass through like we're ghostly beings.
We have every right to complain. Why? Because we are free, after all.
We can't just laugh along with every insults they throw on us, as if it was only a joke. We can't just smile along with every lame statement they throw on us. And we just can't ride along with their funny lines, to think that we are their victims.
I don't care if bullies did these on purpose or accidentally. In any way it's not funny, totally. We have feelings, emotions, and hearts. Hellooooo... Like, excuse me, aren't we free take revenge on them? (Now I'm really, really angry.)
That's it. They had already crossed the line. They had already pulled the last straw.
I'm speaking here like a person knowing its freedom and free will. I'm speaking here like a bird longing for its freedom. I'm speaking here like I know that it is right for someone like me, a feeble little being who is a natural rebel.
I'm not saying these for personal gain or something, but I'm thoroughly mad at this very moment. You know why, and that's all I need to say before somebody calls me a stupid blabbermouth.
Right. And about these issues I'm talking about. Let's just say that they have something to do with lines, talks and most importantly, DAMNED insults, of course.
Once again, I'm sorry for those I offended.
[Ow. The wonders of copy-pasta. Ripped from my first blog. *shrugs* Oh- when was this written? A very long time, perhaps. And oh- look deeper. =] I've hid something here. *shot*]
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